New Frontiers in Poor Life Choices

A good bit of education used to be dedicated to helping people avoid poor life choices. “Gallant studies hard to pass tests, while Goofus knocks over liquor stores to feed his meth habit.” But some people go above and beyond the call of duty to make the worst lifestyle choices possible.

Meet Matthew Stager.

U.S. Marshals need help tracking down a convicted sex offender recently released from a Virginia prison after he failed to show up at a transitional center in Texas.

News outlets report authorities say 44-year-old Matthew Ezekiel Stager was released Thursday from the Federal Correctional Complex in Petersburg.

He was supposed to check into the transitional center that day but never did.

Marshals say it’s possible Stager is in the Hampton Roads area or has recently traveled through the region.

Authorities say Stager has known connection to multiple states and has a history of drug abuse and mental health concerns.

You don’t say.

Marshals describe Stager as a white or Hispanic man, about 145 pounds, 5 feet 8 inches tall with blond or strawberry hair. He has tattoos on his face, head and neck.

Anyone with information can contact the U.S. Marshals at 1-877-926-8332.

So if you see this freak, Uncle Sam will likely make it worth your time…

Update: As per commenter Roadgeek below, he’s been captured. And another tidbit: “He is known to go by the aliases Moon Black and Jesse Crew.”

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2 Responses to “New Frontiers in Poor Life Choices”

  1. roadgeek says:

    He’s been caught in Washington DC according to the daily rag.

  2. millard fillmore says:

    Caught in Washington.C.?Wasn’t it hard to weed him out among the freaks?Maybe they kept Pelosi off the streets while they looked for him.

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