Nancy Pelosi Crushes Her Democratic Enemies, Drives Them Before Her, Hears The Lamentations of Their Legislative Aides

Just as the prophecy foretold, Nancy Pelosi easily crushed a small band of Democratic rebels to regain the Speaker’s gavel in 2019:

Representative Nancy Pelosi (D., Calif.) was nominated Wednesday to serve as the next speaker of the House, despite strident opposition from a small subset of her Democratic caucus. Pelosi’s nomination was all but guaranteed as the House Democrats opposed to her nomination failed to present an alternative candidate.

Awful hard to beat something with nothing, especially when the “something” has a steely, unwavering will to power, a vindictive streak and a long memory.

With the nomination secured by a vote of 203-32, the California progressive must now win over a majority of the House in a floor vote in early January before she can claim the gavel. Since the entire Republican caucus will likely vote against her, Pelosi can only afford to lose the support of 17 Democrats if she hopes to win the speakership.

There’s no living Republican House Democrats would be willing to back over Pelosi. Or even any dead one. Were Abraham Lincoln miraculously restored to life to seek the job, within minutes Democrats would be calling him a tool of patriarchy and running black-and-white attack ads in which the unseen, ominous-voiced narrator asks: “Lincoln: Is he really against slavery?”

While Pelosi was running unopposed, the party modified the standard nomination ballot to include a “no” option, so that freshman Democrats who ran on opposing her could tell their constituents they followed through on their respective pledges.

And last Saturday I went on a hunger strike to protest all the injustice in the world. Or, as other people call it, “skipped lunch.”

Pelosi reportedly supported those freshmen lawmakers, giving them the go ahead to vote “no” to preserve their political capital.

Translation: Democrats think their constituents are idiots who will forgive transparent lies as long as some sort of meaningless symbolic placating gesture is made. Given the sort of Democrats they elected, can we really say that judgment is wrong?

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2 Responses to “Nancy Pelosi Crushes Her Democratic Enemies, Drives Them Before Her, Hears The Lamentations of Their Legislative Aides”

  1. Dwight Brown says:

    “Just as the prophecy foretold, Nancy Pelosi easily crushed a small band of Democratic rebels to regain the Speaker’s gavel in 2019.”

    And then the murders began.

  2. Dryer Ball says:

    Here’s an idea that was used many years ago in the state legislature where I am from:

    The Republicans should negotiate with a ambitious Democrat to make that ambitious Democrat the speaker of the house… by pairing 100% of the Republican votes with at least 17 of the insurgent Democrat votes. In return for voting for a non-Pelosi Democrat as speaker, the Republicans can ask for a better split on some committees (e.g. the judiciary committee could be 12 dems and 11 republicans instead of 14 dems and 10 republicans, etc.) or some other concession.

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