Posts Tagged ‘Iowahawk’
Thursday, March 27th, 2014
There’s just no end to the Leland Yee/Raymond “Shrimp Boy” Chow arms trafficking story, so here are some updates and tidbits:
Yee is out on $500,000 bond, his passport has been confiscated, and he’s been told not to leave California. I dunno about you, but $500,000 seems low for someone accused of running a major arms trafficking ring. Good thing Chinese tongs have never been known to smuggle people in or out of a country illegally…
Yee also withdrew from the California Secretary of State race. There goes the “any publicity is good publicity” theory…
Democrats were all for keeping convicted felon Rod Wright around as a state senator, but now that Yee is making all the wrong headlines, suddenly they want to kick Yee out because he was indicted.
Yee was honored last week by the Northern California chapter of the Society of Professional Journalists.
A quick rundown on all the key players.
And an even quicker look at all the charges.
The indictment on Shrimp Boy’s misdeeds: “Chow’s criminal history includes a guilty plea in federal court for racketeering, involving murder for hire, conspiracy to distribute heroin, arson, and conspiracy to collect extensions of credit.” 1. Shrimp Boy is obviously well-rounded, 2. “conspiracy to collect extensions of credit”? YOU MONSTER! (Actually, I’m guessing this may be loan sharking.)
Also indicted is a Alan Chiu, who is described as a “close associate” of Chow and is “employed by Men’s Warehouse.” Well, now we know where Shrimp Boy gets all of those natty outfits…
Kongphet Chanthavong is described as a Thai citizen with a felony conviction and “an outstanding warrant of deportation; however, country conditions preclude deportation.” What? Which country’s conditions? Ours, because Obama refuses to enforce immigration law, or Thailand? If the later, just get him a one way-ticket to Bangkok and let Thai officials deal with him. Problem solved.
Marlon Darrell Sullivan was indicted on narcotics trafficking, gun trafficking, and the murder-for-hire scheme. I’m guessing it’s this Marlon Sullivan, who represents football players Matt Toeaina, Jonathan Fanene, and Pat Williams, and boxer Karim Mayfield. I was unfamiliar with Mayfield until I ran across his name this morning. Where? On Chow’s Facebook page.
Just how does a sports agent wake up one day and say to himself: “You know, the agent business is good and all, but I really want to break into the lucrative world of contract killing”?
Maybe because he never left the street. “Marlon Sullivan, according to the federal affidavit, told undercover agents he’d have no trouble pulling off a ‘hit’, saying ‘I got a hundred niggas, I still got my ties to the street. I got young boys who love me.’”
Also this: “As I write, Sullivan’s whereabouts are unknown. He did not appear at the hearing where more than 20 of the defendants were arraigned.”
Yee traveled in the circles you would expect a California state senator to travel in:
He evidently has friends on the South Side:
(In case you don’t get the reference, that’s singer Moby. Kids, ask your parents what a “Moby” was…)
Lee has a Twitter account.
Oh my:
Iowahawk goes to town on the story (no doubt in a souped-up dragon tong roadster):
Iowahawk also pointed out this gem of an Los Angeles Times headline: “For Democrats, politicians in handcuffs point to image problems.”
But that’s not the only supergenius headline they offer up on the case. There’s also this sparkling example of the headline-writer’s art: “Leland Yee indictment may mark abrupt end to his political career.” Really? You think? Then again, he is a Democrat. Convictions couldn’t fully derail Marion Barry or Alcee Hastings careers…
All the story needs to take it to the next level is Lo Pan casting fireballs from his fingers…
Tags:Alan Chiu, Border Controls, California, Crime, Democrats, Guns, Iowahawk, Jihad, Kongphet Chanthavong, Leland Yee, Marlon Darrell Sullivan, Raymond "Shrimp Boy" Chow, San Francisco, Twitter
Posted in Border Control, Crime, Democrats, Guns | 1 Comment »
Sunday, March 2nd, 2014
So Russia is conducting a piecemeal invasion of Ukraine.
And the American state department’s response?
Ah, yes, “working with Russia.” I’m sure that has Putin quaking in his boots. How are we supposed to “work with” them? By helping them carry the loot back to Russia? Can you imagine George H. W. Bush threatening to “work with Iraq on Kuwait” after Saddam invaded?
If Russia invades another country, will we work with them some more?
I’m sure at this point, Putin must be quaking in his boots in fear at the thought of Kerry deploying more diplomacy to his tanks. Likewise, I’m sure the people of Ukraine are deeply grateful for those C-130s filled to the brim with diplomacy we’re sending…
Given Kerry’s repeated threats of deploying yet more diplomacy to stop Putin, it’s time to break out Iowahawk’s classic Johnny Nuance, the story of a man fighting outlaws in the old west using only diplomacy:
Johnny Nuance! Johnny Nuance!
From the shores of Martha’s Vineyard he rode his horse out West,
With a treaty in his holster and a medal on his chest,
Bringing law and justice to a wild and violent land,
Talking was his creed and sanctions were his brand!
It goes about as well as you would expect…
Tags:Democrats, Iowahawk, John Kerry, Russia, Ukraine, Vladimir Putin
Posted in Democrats, Foreign Policy | 1 Comment »
Monday, April 1st, 2013
175 days after it started, there’s still no resolution to the Iowahawk hostage crises, with the web pundit still held in captivity by the leftwing Al-Bama Dignity Brigade terrorist group.
“No more shall the infidel insult our prophet (peace be upon him) or make fun our sacred texts!”
Al-Bama has held Iowahawk captive “somewhere in the greater Des Moines area” since October 9, 2012, when a daring midnight raid snatched him from his fortified garage compound. Since then nothing has been heard from the beloved pundit except occasional tweets and pictures of hot rods.
The terrorist group has repeatedly threatened to kill the pundit, sending various media outlets severed piston rods from a 1931 Ford Model A to prove their seriousness.
Police promises to find the pundit (“Yeah, we’ll get right on that,” said a spokesman who asked not to be identified or disturbed while the NCAA basketball tournament was on) have thus far been fruitless.
Al-Bama’s initial demands were for the immediate imposition of comprehensive gun control, universal socialized medicine, $10 million in ransom, and the public flogging of radio personality Rush Limbaugh. When these demands were not met, Al-Bama gradually reduced them. Their most recent demands were for $325, a public apology from Bill O’Riley “for living,” and 12 cases of Olde Main beer.
Those with information on Iowahawk’s current whereabouts are urged to contact the National Bloggers Club.
Tags:blogging, Iowahawk, Satire
Posted in Crime | 1 Comment »
Monday, October 8th, 2012
Today was dedicated to exercise and fiction, so here’s a quick LinkSwarm:
Texas Public Policy Foundation offers a status breakdown of various lawsuits Texas has filed against the EPA to curb regulatory overreach. The state has won more than it’s lost.
Ted Cruz on Obama’s anti-growth agenda.
The hysterical reaction of Obama’s liberal allies to his debate loss has made things worse for him.
Iowahawk reports on a recent outbreak of scrutonium, “a deadly poll-eating supervirus that attacks the immuno-hope system, leaving victims vulnerable to material facts.”
A supporter of the Party of Tolerance sent Mia Love a package containing pictures of Klansmen and abortions.
True the Vote finds more of that voter fraud that doesn’t exist.
China launches it’s first aircraft carrier.
Perry vs. World thinks that Dewhurst is the favorite for reelection.
Texas Democrats can’t raise money.
Paul Salder, trial lawyer.
Williamson County Republican leaders endorse Pauline Law and Tere McCann for Round Rock ISD Board of Trustees. (Via Holly Hansen, who has lots more RRISD info. If you live in the district, go over there and keep scrolling.)
Tags:China, Democrats, Holly Hansen, Iowahawk, Paul Sadler, Presidential Race, Republicans, Round Rock ISD, Ted Cruz, Texas, Texas Senate Race, Williamson County
Posted in Democrats, Military, Republicans, Texas | No Comments »
Saturday, May 5th, 2012
You may have heard of the Obama campaign’s attempt to use an imaginary woman named Julia to convince women to embrace a cradle-to-grave welfare state. (And looking at European demographics, we can only assume that’s more grave than cradle.)
Naturally, conservatives have had fun on Twitter with #Julia, including the observation that her male counterpart would naturally be named “Winston.” Also: “#Julia died at age 78. She voted Democrat until age 92.”
But, as usual, IowaHawk nails it.
Some other Julia tidbits:
What was left out of Julia’s story: She’s not a taxpayer, she’s not married, and she’s not religious.
The Heritage Foundation reimagines her life.
Paul Ryan calls it creepy and demeaning.
Ad “Twitter” to the list of things The New York Times doesn’t understand. (I know, it’s a long list.) Hey NYT, it isn’t the “Republican Response Machine,” it’s the swarm. The reason I named this blog “BattleSwarm” was after the Rand Corporation’s Swarming and the Future of Conflict: Dispersed, autonomous units come together at a point to concentrate their firepower. It’s the army of Davids. It’s the future of media. It means that the MSM has lost control of the narrative and there’s nothing you can do to get it back.
Tags:#Julia, 2012 Election, Elections, Iowahawk, Media Watch, Obama, Paul Ryan, Twitter, Welfare State
Posted in Media Watch, Welfare State | 2 Comments »
Monday, March 5th, 2012
A busy weekend, so here’s a LinkSwarm to nourish the regulars:
The SEIU is helping fund and lead the Occupy movement, and their goal is to “abolish capitalism.” They’re also sneakily incorporating local branches, with names like “Good Jobs, Great Houston.” (Hat tip: Common Sense and Wonder.)
Also on on Commonsense and Wonder: an interesting piece about the history of Islamic conquest.
Add another member to Republican’s super-majority in the Texas House: Rep. J. M. Lozano of Kingsville (District 43) just announced his switch to the Republican Party.
In related news, here’s a piece from last year in the liberal Texas Observer talking about Republican outreach to Hispanics. That seems to be working out a lot better than the “inevitable Democratic majority” theory people like Ruy Teixeira have been pushing for the last decade.
Obama’s IRS attacks the Tea Party.
Iowahawk on Andrew Breitbart: “How did this socially liberal Jewish RINO from Brentwood become the Emmanuel Goldstein of the left’s unhinged 2-Minutes Hate? A big, lovable, random, generous, fearless, patriotic grinning goofball.”
Down With Wind: “If wind power was going to work, it would have done so by now. The people of Britain see this quite clearly, though politicians are often wilfully deaf. The good news though is that if you look closely, you can see David Cameron’s government coming to its senses about the whole fiasco. ” (Hat tip: Powerline.)
Texas’ outsized role in U.S. exports.
Debra Medina may run for State Comptroller? We could do worse.
How feminist dogma has hidden an obvious truth: the wide availability of contraception has increased illegitimacy, general to the detriment of women.
UT to student media director: Balance your department budget. Student media director: OK, how about we sell these TV and radio licenses? UT: Not that balanced. You’re fired. (Hat tip: Mike Godwin’s Facebook page.)
Tags:Andrew Breitbart, Debra Medina, environmentalism, Iowahawk, IRS, J. M. Lozano, LinkSwarm, SEIU, Tea Party, Texas, unions, wind power
Posted in Democrats, Republicans, Texas, unions | No Comments »
Friday, December 16th, 2011
I get the impression that this “Christmas” thing you hear so much about is getting close. I should probably do something about that. In the meantime, some links:
Iowahawk channels Stephen G. Bloom on the Hell that is Iowa.
Dwight has a good bit on the left’s favorite cop killer. “I believe some people do things so awful to other people that they deserve to die. I believe Ted Bundy deserved to die. I believe Ronald Clark O’Bryan deserved to die. And I think Abu-Jamal deserves to die.”
Dwight also mentioned Christopher Hitchens’ Why Orwell Matters, which I have not read. (In fact, while I have read numerous of Hitchens’ essays, I have not read any of his books, which is a deficiency I should probably correct.) Here’s a very interesting interview with him on the subject. However, if I may rudely quibble with the recently dead (and I suspect Hitchens would insist on doing so in the same situation), I do take partial issue with his assertion that “the right doesn’t have anyone it can come up with from that period who was as prescient as Orwell.” I would argue that Malcolm Muggeridge’s reporting on the Holodomor (Ukrainian famine) would not only qualify, it preceded Orwell’s reporting from Catalonia.
Speaking of Hitchens, Michael Totten reprints their entirely-too-exciting exciting exploits in Lebanon together. That’s also reprinted in The Road to Fatima Gate, which i should give off my lazy ass and do a review of before the year is over. (Summary: If you want to know what’s happened in Lebanon over the last decade, you should read it.)
Mark Steyn on how America wasted the unipolar moment.
More on the Democrats’ white working class problem.
A view from across the pond: “The failure of the Occupy Wall Street movement and its descent into Lord of the Flies-style chaos, and in many instances thuggery and criminality, is emblematic of the dramatic decline of the Left in the United States.” (Yeah, I submitted the Fark story as well.)
Dallas vs. Detroit.
And just in case you missed it, Texas is still kicking ass on the jobs front.
On a completely non-political note: Llamas With Hats.
Tags:Christopher Hitchens, Democrats, Dwight Brown, Holodomor, Iowahawk, LinkSwarm, Malcolm Muggeridge, Mumia Abu-Jamal
Posted in Communism, Crime, Democrats | No Comments »
Sunday, September 4th, 2011
You’ve heard about the Fast and Furious Gunwalker Scandal. And you’ve heard about the scandal involving the Obama Administration’s raid of Gibson Guitars. But it took Iowahawk to combine them.
Tags:BATFE, Fast and Furious, Gibson Guitars, Guns, Gunwalker, Iowahawk, Obama, Satire
Posted in Crime, Democrats, Guns | No Comments »